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i made a p4 boy cry
Tuesday, June 23, 2009 - 7:57 PM

i'm dead tired. fell asleep once on the floor and fell asleep again when leaning on my table - both unintentionally!

BUT super long never feel like i have so much to want to pen down. either its caused by the bus rides or maybe its just the new playlist that i have been listening on repeat. or its just the memories which i have erased but brought back to life once more. and it seems like these old friends are treating me so nice because they want to make up for what you have owed me -_- call me cynical.

i went and is still doing some camp thing with primary school children. so there was this really naughty but quite cute boy in my group. totally ignorant, talks loudly and sometimes just looking for attention. so there was this game where we had to protect an egg. and its not a surprised that he was the person who broke it. and the entire group blames him for it. so i told him when we had some time alone that he should improve on his attitude bla bla bla haha and wanted to tell the class as well that it was rude to blame him and only him as everyone else should be responsible. so when talking to him, this boy started crying. so poor thing. can't believe this kind of cute small boy who seem as if he is not afraid of anything cried when i talked to him so nicely, i bet its the guilt from the blame of his friends and of course a person so much older asking him about what is the thing that he should have improved on.

well well the boy after crying was fine hahaha. and became even more naughty just to cover up for his crying moment. it got me thinking. i wonder whether i was like that at that age. selfishly blaming others when sth screwed up or living life behind a facade so that my voice will mask my emptiness or fill my unsatiated attention. come to think of it - maybe i'm still like that NOW hahah maybe i've been sarcastic after all this time, just to cover my insecurities, emptiness and loneliness...... i'm just kidding hahaha (of course a mc kamiyama moment, this is to commemorate the last episode of the quiz show, which i'm sure you all didnt watch)